In The Fashionista's Closet: Mother Sucker

Went to visit my mother for Mother's Day. I love that woman. I'm a sucker for my mother. My mom has always been my biggest cheerleader, giving me hope when I had none, building me back up when I was at my lowest.

Top: H&M

Necklace: (Chain belt doubled up) Sam Moon

Skirt: H&M

Bracelets: InPink, Forever 21

Shoes: Steve Madden

My mom was a teen mom (before it was on MTV) and she's always had high expectations of me. She has always wanted better for me than what she had but what I really love about her is that she was never a victim of her circumstances.

We didn't grow up in the lap of luxury and for the majority of my childhood, my mom raised me and my sister as a single mom (before she met my stepdad and my youngest sister was born.)

But we never went without the necessities or wants for that matter. Now, as an adult, I know that my mother struggled but I never felt that as a child.

She told me that she never wanted us to know how tough it was and I didn't for a really long time. And that enabled me to be a kid. And for that, I am grateful.

Even though my mom thinks that I am too hard on myself, she has always respected whatever decisions that I make and been there whenever I have needed her. But she's also tough when I don't want her to be but need her to be. And I know that whatever comes my way, she will always, always show me unconditional love.  

My mom is a talented artist, a social butterfly, she's loyal to her friends and dependable to a fault. She's a voracious reader, quick witted, generous, constantly open to trying new things and loves to laugh. I'd like to think that I've inherited a little bit of some of what makes me and everyone else love her so much.

Happy Mother's Day to my mommy.

She's the absolute best.....

In The Fashionista's Closet: Lemons and Swag

My lemon pants are in honor of someone leaving a sour taste in my mouth. (But I love these pants!) Let's say I met a guy when I was leaving Target. Let's say the guy asked for my number and I gave it. We have never gone out because there has been something not quite right about him and I learned the lesson to go with my gut in situations like this. Remember Job Fair dude? Anway, Target Guy called and here are snippets of our conversations:

Earrings: Can't remember but I love them

Linen top: Thrifted

Pants: Thrifted (I <3 these pants)

Bracelets: Forever 21, Sam Moon

Bag: Prada

Shoes: Steven by Steve Madden

Him: So what do you do?

Me: I'm a teacher.

Him: Oh, ok. I'm the vice-president at a bank.

Me: *silence*

Him: Yeah, I told my cousin about you. I told him that you had swag.

Hold up, hold up, HOLD UP! What person over thirty years old is using the word swag seriously in a conversation? My students say swag and mean it. With them, everything is about somebody having swag, not having swag and being swaggerific. *Come on, son.*

He told me during one conversation that he really wanted to see me because he wore a suit to work and wanted me to see his swag.

AGAIN with the swag??? And if you are the vice-president of a bank, shouldn't you wearing a suit be an everyday kinda thing? I PRO-MISE you I was looking at my phone thinking, "I ain't about this life."

I believe that he may be a teller or works at Ace Check Cashing but he's no vice-president. Not that there's anything wrong with that but there's no need to lie.

He has asked me to send him a photo of myself. (I.did.not.do.that.) I think he's the type to show a photo around and tell dudes, "Yeah, that's me right there." And it is not.

But the kicker was yesterday. He sent me a text message after we got off the phone asking me what was my favorite shoe and shoe size.

*Drops the mic and walks away*

*Takes a bow.*

*You're welcome.*

Sir. You buying shoes for women? No flowers or candy, you coming up off monies to buy shoes??? You don't even know my last name. We've never even gone out! Do you think that this is an episode of Real Housewives or Basketball Wives?  But what I really want to know is WHO is this working on??? Next he's gonna wanna take me to Red Lobster with the cheddar biscuits. Game recognize game, sir. And you looking kinda unfamiliar right now. (See Boondocks clip below.)

This means that your game is wack, sir. He definitely needs to have a "Conversation with Chris!"

On a sidenote, I am rather pleased with other aspects of my personal life right now...

In The Fashionista's Closet: The Best Medicine

Found this nifty little number at the thrift store. It was long and shapeless and muu-muu-ish. Until I added the belt.

Earrings: Beauty Supply

Dress: Thrifted

Men's Belt: Thrifted

OH! I forgot to tell yall a funny story that happened when my students were testing a couple of weeks ago.

Bag: Prada

Bracelets: Forever 21/ InPink

Shoes: Jessica Simpson Kylie

Soooooo....we were testing and I had to go the bathroom quickly while someone watched my class. I went in, did my business and pulled my skirt up. *It was one of those stretchy tube skirts.* When I got back into my classroom I realized that I had pulled my skirt up the wrong way and it was now upside down. So the bottom of the skirt was now at my waist and it was inside out! The tag was sticking out at the bottom! I had to walk around and monitor that way until someone came to relieve me for my break. I was hoping that none of my students noticed, which I don't think that they did because they would have mentioned it, they don't miss much. #hotmess (Do people still say Hot Mess? I think that will never go out of style but I needs to know.)

I wasn't feeling like myself that day, I was stressed out worrying if my students would do well and hoping that I prepared them properly.

But I've learned you gotta laugh at times like these to get you through and if it's at your own expense, well that's just a bonus.  

"The most wasted of all days is one without laughter." e.e. cummings

 

 

Conversations With Chris: First Date Attire

I have a friend. Let's call him, Chris. (His name, in actuality, is Chris.) Chris and I were talking and he told me that he could write a book giving women and men dating advice. *Insert side eye here.* Chris is a tall, good looking dude, who I suspect sometimes thinks that he's Boris Kodjoe (he denies this.) But he says he has lots of female friends that come to him for advice. So I began to ask Chris questions about different scenarios and (some) of his advice made sense. When he would tell me "Looka here..let me tell you something..." then I knew that I was going to get a "Chris-ism" and thus an idea was born! I told him that I was going to give the readers of Fashion Nette-work the benefit of his "expertise" and help with dating and relationship dilemmas.

I asked Chris what should a woman wear on a first date. His response: "A man wants a woman who can show what she's working with but not too much thigh or too much breast." (I felt like he was talking about my favorite chicken shack!) Too much showing means that you're trying too hard and aren't really looking for a relationship. Not enough means you may be too conservative or uptight. But don't get him wrong, Chris said that a man sometimes likes to know that other men are checking his lady out but not because you are looking like you just left your job at the strip club. Chris' advice? "Don't look like a hoe. If we wanted to see hoes, we can go to the strip club!" So ladies, no clear heels, cutout bandage dresses or tip jars on your first date.

(Toni Braxton: DoingTheMost.com)

Straight from the man's mouth! Hoe = No. What say you? Agree or disagree? Any other questions for Chris? Speak on it... 

I would rock this on a date a la Mrs. Obama.

"Looking Duck Lip In Her Pictures"....

My name is Juanette. And I have a problem.

I am a victim of duck face pictures. No, not on my blog. But the photos on my Facebook are rampant with the

"duck face."

Exhibit A. (Above)

 B.

 and C.

I'm not sure when it started.
(The fact that I am most often throwing up the deuce, i.e. "peace sign" doesn't bother me, I've been doing that for years.)

My little sis sent me the photo below and asked if this was my daughter. It's a screen shot from a Nickelodeon show that she paused and took a picture of because it reminded her of me.

I told her I didn't think so because her lips weren't pursed enough to be my offspring.

Duck Face. It's real. I'll try to stop. But I can't promise anything...

Hilarious! There's even a website dedicated to anti-duckface photos: http://antiduckface.com/

If you don't get help at Charter, please get help somewhere....

In The Fashionista's Closet: Censored (Kinda)

Wore this outfit to a birthday party.

Earrings: Aldo Accessories

Top: American Apparel bodysuit

Skirt: Thrifted (Got this skirt for a buck, took it to a tailor and had it shortened)

Clutch: DSW

Shoes: Nine West

Sometimes I do censor myself, contrary to popular belief.  Except when I talk to certain friends, then it's no holds barred. Reiko thinks we should have a podcast but I would need a five second delay like at live awards shows.

Sometimes I don't say the things that I want to say because of the people that read my blog.

But if I COULD say what I wanted to say, I might say that the birthday boy forgot that it wasn't going to be his birthday forever.

You know how you feel on your birthday, all invincible and popular and like you "got it going on"?

 (P.S. Do people still say "got it going on"?)  

Then there's the day after your birthday, when everybody else goes back to normal. And you realize that you've been acting like Boris Kodjoe on his birthday. 

 Just a gentle reminder.....

In The Fashionista's Closet: Winning Weekend

I laughed a lot this weekend. A lot. Even though we had Saturday School yesterday.
I ain't about that Saturday School life. But it turned out okay.   

Earrings: Gifted by my friend the school counselor, I love them so!

Jacket: Thrifted and gifted by Reiko

Mens's Shirt: Thrifted

Skirt: H&M

Shoes: Jessica Simpson

Things that made me happy this weekend: Attending a happy hour with a great friend, making new friends and seeing old friends.

Laughing loudly, playing Words with Friends (I'm winning), having engaging conversations....and watching line dances and hilarious YouTube videos.....

Bracelets: Forever 21; Sam Moon

Bag: Prada

Soaking up the awesome weather and enjoying tasty adult beverages (T.A.B.s) with my oldest and dearest friend..

 and eating the best.burger.ever. at Village Burger Bar. No. I mean it. I live for their burgers. It is second only to a word that begins with S and everyone does it.....Why, shopping of course (what were YOU thinking???)

How was YOUR weekend?